Confessions of a Beast: A Phoenix Pack Urban Paranormal (Saved By A Beast Book 3) Read online

  For 15 minutes, they were attached together; eyes glowing. Kellan felt the tremors of her repeated orgasms while his dick continued to spurt his release deep into her. Soon after, her walls began to slowly release him. Kellan watched as her eyes flickered between human and wolf, before finally settling to their human forms. Her limbs went lax, her head tilted to the side and her eyes closed as she fell asleep. Kellan’s eyes returned human and he was able to withdraw from his mate. After withdrawing completely from her, he checked to make sure she wasn’t hurt. She was breathing normally. Taking a deep breath, Kellan smiled wide as he smelled the change in the scent of his mate. He rubbed her stomach before kissing her on the forehead and leaving her to continue sleeping.

  ***

  Bliss hummed in relief as her eyes opened slowly. Her body had small aches and pains, but there was this calmness inside her body that made her feel relaxed. She felt the weight of Kellan resting on top of her. His head was against her stomach. He was talking softly before he kissed her bare belly. Bliss thought nothing of it. All she could think of was the fact that the heating was over.

  “Thank god,” she sighed.

  “What you talking about?” Kellan asked, picking up his head and looking at her.

  “The damn heating is over. I love sex, baby I do. But the pain?! I can live a hundred years without it.”

  “Well, unfortunately, you were born a woman and those kind of natural pains you can’t escape.” He kissed her stomach again.

  “Tell me about it,” Bliss scoffed. “Who were you talking to by the way?” she asked. He moved from on top of her so she could sit up.

  “My pup,” he replied. Bliss sprang up immediately. Off the bat, she noticed something was different. Bliss could smell Kellan’s scent, but there was another scent lingering in their bedroom.

  “Huh?” she asked dumbfounded.

  “Use your senses,” he prodded her. Bliss took a deep breath; inhaling the scents around her. She smelled her mate but then there was something else. But no one else was there. Something came over her that was instinctual. She knew the scent belonged to her baby.

  “Oh my god,” she gasped looking down at her stomach. She looked back up at Kellan who was smiling at her. She leaned in and kissed him.

  “Holy shit,” she exclaimed. “I didn’t know it would happen this quickly! I don’t know, I thought it would have been something more.”

  “Last time during your heating I was just fucking you to show you relief. You could have been pregnant, but it didn’t happen. This time, I timed when your eggs would be releasing, and your point of fertility was at its highest. And that’s when I released inside if you. You gripped me, and we connected, pregnancy is pretty much inevitable at that point.”

  “Wait, you scented my fertility?” Kellan only nodded.

  “Damn, sometimes these powers are incredible. But well, I’m happy.” She touched her stomach.

  “Can you scent the gender?” Kellan shook his head.

  “No. It’s too soon for that. But you’ll probably know the gender before anyone else. Come, babe. You’ve been asleep for 12 hours you need to eat something.”

  “I’m scared,” Bliss blurted out as she got out of the bed. Kellan looked at her and took her hand.

  “Hey, I’m your alpha baby girl. I’ll make sure nothing happens to you.” He kissed her forehead. “You trust me right?”

  “Yeah I trust you,” she smiled.

  “You’d better,” he chuckled leading her out of the room. The moment they hit the tunnels, the smell of food came over them. Bliss growled in hunger speaking for both her and her pup. Kellan laughed at her. So it began. He continued to hold her hand as they emerged from the tunnels into the kitchen.

  The pack turned, nodding in respect for their alphas. But it was Jaxson who took the first long sniff. Then the rest of the pack followed. Everyone turned and looked at Bliss.

  “You’re pregnant!” Rita squealed. Kellan chuckled as the pack swarmed her, hugging her tightly and clapping. Jaxson and Tristan patted Kellan on the back. Jayce came over and did the same after hugging Bliss. Then Jayce looked at his mate and hugged her tightly before tonguing her down; knowing that when she went into heat, they were free to have pups now that Bliss was pregnant.

  “Thank you,” Rita said to Bliss knowing that she wasn’t going to wait to have any pups because Rita was ready to have her own.

  “Anything for my pack,” Bliss said. “But I advise if someone doesn’t feed me right now, it’s gonna be hell.” The pack scrambled away, Gemma hurrying to the stove to whip Bliss up a plate. Tristan came next to her to help. Their skin brushed together slightly, and electricity zapped between them. Gemma jumped out of the way and looked at him. He breathed heavily as he stared at her too.

  “Staring makes it worse,” she whispered. Tristan blinked, snapping from his thoughts.

  “Sorry,” he replied. Gemma was astonished. Apologizing was not his thing. And the fact that he was doing it for her put her in shock.

  “I don’t mean to make you feel bad,” she said.

  “No; you’re fine. It’s not like I don’t deserve it. Not by the way I’m treating you in the first place. I just-you’re beautiful Gemma. I can’t help but stare. But I will try my best to do better.” He gave her a grim smile before walking away. Gemma continued to pile Bliss’s plate with food before she helped serve everyone else. Bliss groaned at the sight of the food and began eating hastily. Kellan tried to slow her down, but Bliss snapped her jaws at him.

  “Hey,” he scolded. “Don’t snap at me.”

  “Then don’t touch my food,” she replied. Kellan only smiled at her. Everyone joined the table with food piled on their plates. Bliss and Kellan sat next to each other; so did Rita and Jayce. Tristan sat opposite of Gemma with Jaxson next to him. Dell’s wolves hadn’t joined them for the meal. They had stopped doing that, and no one had asked questions. They weren’t part of the pack, so they didn’t have to sit and have meals. The three young wolves that Rita had rescued were back in their packs, but Gemma kept in touch with them.

  Unable to talk much about anything else; everyone was talking about Bliss’s pregnancy. Gemma was truly happy for her alpha female and for Rita who she knew was ready to be a mother herself. But Gemma felt left out of the conversations. It was about relationships and babies, things she had no clue about.

  “You okay Gemma?” Kyra asked. “You’re quiet.”

  “Yeah I’m okay,” Gemma said forcing a smile.

  “You should eat some more,” Tristan said to her softly. Rightfully so she hadn’t touched much of her food.

  “I’m not all that hungry,” she replied. No one said anything after that. They left her alone and continued to talk about babies. As everyone finished their meals; Gemma stood and began clearing the table. She had distanced herself so much from the conversation that she didn’t sense when Tristan came up behind her.

  “Gemma,” he said. Gemma startled, yelping quietly and whirled around. He caught her before she fell over. When he touched her skin; she was wrapped in flames. Memories of their kiss flooded her brain, and her arousal assaulted her without her even being prepared for it. Every time he touched her she was going to have flashbacks of their first kiss. She didn’t know how to forget it.

  “Don’t sneak up on me like that,” she whispered. When she looked at him, she gasped at the glow of his emerald wolf eyes. He was still holding onto her arms. Gemma could scent his need and his craving for her. But something was holding him back.

  “You can have me you know,” she said breathlessly. “Why don’t you want me?”

  “I never said I didn’t want you,” he growled.

  “So show me you do want me,” she begged. Accepting the challenge, Tristan carried Gemma hurriedly from the kitchen. Everyone else was too busy talking to notice what they were doing. Tristan led her to his bedroom where he closed them inside. He stared at her, drowning in the scent of her arousal. He was succumbing to the pull of
the mating bond, and he didn’t know how to snap himself out of it. Unable to help himself he pushed her down to the bed roughly. He pounced on top of her; kissing her neck and chest. The animal inside him howled in pleasure at the taste of his mate. Tristan himself was in a state of bliss, unable to control himself.

  “Wait, Tristan slow down.” But Tristan barely heard her. All he could hear was his raging hormones in his ear, driving him to take his mate and take her hard. She was wearing a skirt, so he roughly pushed it up. He spread her legs apart as he bit onto her neck. Without another thought, he tried to delve his fingers into her small folds. She let out a shriek of pain.

  Tristan was frozen solid on top of her. Blood began draining from his face. His arousal quieted, and he could finally think: not only that, but his senses came back to him. No longer did he scent Gemma’s arousal. All he could scent was her panic and fear and her pain. Looking down at her body he saw her shaking with fear. The last thing Tristan ever wanted to do was to make his mate afraid of him. The resistance he felt in her folds reminded him that she still had her innocence. Hopping off her quickly, he fixed her skirt and pulled her to stand up.

  “I’m so sorry Gemma,” he rambled. “I couldn’t control myself. I never meant to hurt you this way.” Gemma tried to control the panic she felt within her, but it was hard. Yes, she wanted Tristan, but his pace scared her. She realized how little she knew of how to handle her mate and it made her panic. It made her insecure.

  “I-I’m not mad at you,” she whispered. “I’m just-”

  “You don’t have to explain,” he cut her off. “I should have known your limits.” He kept hold of her hand and led her back out of his room and through the tunnels.

  “I won’t ever do that to you again,” he spoke. He whisked her back into the kitchen, and everything was the same as if they’d never left. Gemma felt herself losing him again and didn’t know how to stop it.

  “Tristan don’t-”

  “I came over here in the first place to let you know that even though we’re not officially mated, you can always come and talk to me if you need to. I still want to make sure you’re okay.” Words stuck in her throat, Gemma just nodded. She felt foolish and embarrassed. He was ready to take her, and she hadn’t been ready to receive him.

  “I’m okay,” she whispered turning away from him. She couldn’t even look at him.

  “I’m sorry Gemma,” he said softly before he walked away. Gemma sighed heavily. She was sorry too. Shaking her head, she continued to clean up so she could take her mind off her lousy situation. She wasn’t paying attention to anything until she heard Bliss growling. When Gemma turned around, she saw that Dell and his wolves had come into the dining area. Bliss in protection of the pup inside her immediately took offense to wolves not part of her pack around her. Gemma left the dishes alone to stand with the rest of the pack.

  “I smell a pup cooking,” Dell commented. Kellan growled this time. Dell put his hands up in submission knowing that what he said aggravated the alpha. Dell advanced towards Bliss, but both the enforcers stood in front of the alpha female.

  “Back up,” Jaxson ordered.

  “You know very well if you’re not part of the pack you can’t go near her,” Tristan added.

  “I just wanna congratulate her that’s all,” Dell said.

  “Don’t push your luck,” Tristan gritted.

  “Let’s just go for our pack run,” Niles spoke up. “You know pack rules.” Dell snapped his head in the direction of his wolf.

  “Tell me what to do again Niles, and I’ll take that as a challenge.” He glared at his wolf before he led them away. Niles looked at Gemma as he passed and gave her a small smile. Gemma returned the gesture before he was out of sight.

  “Meeting tomorrow,” Kellan stated. Bliss was still growling. Kellan placed his hand around her neck and rubbed, trying to soothe her.

  “Let me take her to my room with the rest of the she-wolves. She’ll feel less of a threat there,” Rita offered. Kellan nodded and let his mate go. Rita took her hand.

  “Come on ladies,” she said. Gemma stayed put not following them out thinking she wasn’t considered as one of the women. But Rita turned around and looked at her.

  “Come on Gemma.” Gemma hid her shock and hurried after them to join them. In Rita’s room, Bliss snapped out of her protective mode. She visually relaxed and sighed in relief.

  “I don’t know what that was about,” Bliss said.

  “When you’re around wolves not of your pack, your natural instinct is going to be to get defensive,” Rita informed her. “These two months will be the most vulnerable part of your life.”

  “Oh,” she said.

  “But you’ve got to be able to keep control of your wolf Bliss. You lose control, and you shift, you’re going to lose the pup.” Bliss smacked herself on the forehead. She forgot all about that and she was in no way in control of her wolf.

  “What am I gonna do?” Bliss asked. “If I lose control and shift, Kellan would never forgive me.” Bliss was beyond worried, and it was making her panic, but then out of nowhere, her panic began to be soothed. She thought Mira was around, but when she looked up, it was Gemma who had her hand on her back.

  “Don’t worry Bliss; you know we won’t let you lose control. We’ve got your back no matter what. And I don’t think Kellan would be upset at you either. He’ll understand.” Bliss smiled and took Gemma’s hand.

  “Do you have the same thing that Mira has?” Bliss questioned, wondering how Gemma made her feel so easily relaxed.

  “No,” Gemma giggled. “I don’t think there’s a wolf that’s an empath like her anywhere near here.”

  “Oh,” Bliss smiled.

  “Just thought I’d ask. And what was going on with you at breakfast? I haven’t seen you that quiet.”

  “Just been thinking a lot lately.”

  “Does it have to do with Niles?” Kyra asked teasingly.

  “No,” Gemma laughed.

  “What’s up with you and him anyways? You want him or something?”

  “Of course not. My wolf only wants Tristan. But the human side of me likes the company of Niles. He’s sweet to talk to and hang out with. He’s my age you know.”

  “Gemma you may only be 18, but you’re not a pup,” Kyra said. “The way you helped us destroy Maverick, a pup couldn’t do that. Even though we’re older than you, we will treat you like the woman you are. And if you ever feel less than that, then you gotta speak up.”

  “And if we’re still too old for you then you can always hang out with Maya, Amber, and Brandy,” Rita added.

  “You guys aren’t old,” Gemma laughed. “But yeah I can hang out with those three. Good thing they’re in the same pack as my parents now.”

  “So there you have it,” Bliss said. “Hang out with wolves your age but just know here at our pack we consider you a grown woman.”

  “Too bad not everyone does,” Gemma sighed. No one said anything because they knew exactly who she was talking of. After that, no one had anything to say for rebuttal. There was nothing to say but the fact that her words were true.

  Chapter Three

  Instead of feeling sorry for herself, Gemma took the words of her sister wolves to heart. That night when everyone was settling down with their mates, except Tristan and Gemma, of course, Gemma dressed and prepared to leave the cave. She had in fact called Amber, Brandy, and Maya and they were more than willing to hang out. Dressed in a black leather skirt and a red halter top with white converses, she slipped out of her room. She thought she was in the clear until she head a whistle as she walked into the dining area. Gemma jumped nearly ten feet in the air. Her wolf stood at alert ready to attack. She turned to the whistler, eyes glowing and teeth slowly getting larger in her mouth.

  “Whoa Gemma, it’s only me!” Niles exclaimed. Niles didn’t move a muscle. He waited until Gemma’s wolf recognized him and slowly backed off. When her eyes returned to their human form, he knew it was okay t
o get closer to her.

  “Are you insane?” she asked. “Sneaking up on a newly shifted wolf?”

  “I know. It was dumb. I actually hate people sneaking up on me too.” Gemma’s wolf was always on edge. And she was going to be that way until she and Gemma connected in a way that gained Gemma control of her animal. Right now, her animal followed her own instincts.

  “I could have shifted and ruined my outfit cause of you,” Gemma accused. “So don’t you ever, ever sneak up on me like that again.”

  “I promise it won’t happen again.” He looked her up and down. Gemma could smell the arousal rolling off him. She didn’t think it was necessary to tell him it was never going to happen between them. He knew she had a mate. So she just let him be aroused. It was his free will and his right to be so.

  “Where you going?” he asked.

  “Out with some friends. You can come if you want.” Niles looked around as if he was searching for Tristan. Seeing no sign of him; Niles shrugged and smiled.

  “I’d love to.” Gemma only nodded before turning around and leading the way out of the cave. She slowly said the ‘alpha, beta, omega’ chant in her head in hopes to have control of her wolf tonight. She was going into town near humans and couldn’t risk losing it and shifting in front of hundreds of people. But she needed to be out. She needed to be away from the mated couples, and her mate. And most of all she needed to be away from loneliness.

  ***

  The club was packed. Gemma along with the other girls plus Niles squeezed their way into the tightly packed place. The moment Gemma stepped inside she stopped short. The thumping music overstimulated Gemma’s sensitive hearing. Her wolf did not like it.

  “We have to leave,” Gemma stated. Without answering questions, she high tailed it out of the club and to the safety of the quiet streets.

  “What happened?” Amber asked.